All I Want For Christmas is a Giant Wooden Horse

So yeah, I think about everyone knows the story of Odysseus and the Trojan Horse. There was this huge, long war between Greece and Troy. It'd been going on like ten years, which I guess is decently long for a war. But everyone was getting sick of it, because everyone was dying and no one was winning. So a Greek general, Odysseus, came up with a daring tactic that was SURE to end the war once and for all. One more, those goshdarn Trojans woke up and looked out at the beach and WHOA, all the Greeks were gone! And there's now a giant wooden horse on the beach! So the Trojans assumed that the Greeks had given up and gone home, leaving a giant horse peace offering. Obviously. Except really, *gasp*, it was a trick! All the Greek ships and armies had simply been moved out of sight around the the cove, and the horse, being hollow, contained Odysseus and some of his men. Somehow not realizing something here was fishy, the ecstatic Trojans took the horse into Troy without checking it first, and then proceeded to forget about the horse and get COMPLETELY hammered. That night, when like the whole city was passed out from all the  hardcore partyin', Odysseus and his men jumped out of the horse and brutally slaughtered like, everyone. They deserved it.

Now, as for a dream journey... man, I wanna go like everywhere that isn't on this continent. I'm not picky. Toss me on a plane somewhere. But if I HAD to pick ONE place to go... I'd like to hit up the British Isles. And not do all the touristy stuff like Dublin and London and Stonehenge... I'm feelin' places like Cardiff, Liverpool, Inverness, The Isle of Man, and the Highlands. That whole place is great. I could visit some of my internet friends, do some backpacking in Scotland, or bike across the Irish countryside. Honestly, I could spend weeks vacationing there.