Noah's Big Bad Boat

People were bad. God was sad. Actually no, this was before God had gushy emotions. God was mad. So he decided to wipe out all of the wicked people on the earth. Excluding Noah. Noah was less wicked than the rest of God's humans. God instructed Noah to build an ark which was to protect Noah and his family during the flood that God was intent on sending. Erybody though Noah was crazy but he didn't care. He built the boat and loaded his family on it. And when I say family I really mean all the animals on the earth. There was lots of rain. It lasted for 40 days and 40 nights. Then the water went away, Noah sent out a dove, eventually an olive branch was returned and the boat landed. Rainbow. Promises. No more floods. 

Recently my best friend and I were discussing Noah's boat and she made a very good point. There was one boat. Lots of animal.s One boat. All mammals. ONE boat. All reptiles. ONE BOAT. All birds. ONE BOAT. Where would all of the birds fly around? I'm confused. 

I feel like I am rather harsh on these Bible stories, but I think it is because I grew up being told that this story and others like it were true and then spent a good part of my adolescence thinking critically and realizing that the whole ONE BOAT things doesn't really fly. (Kinda like the birds) So its still rather difficult for me to have a more removed reaction. 

Courtney Burke, I am angry at you for saying that you love foxes, because I love foxes and now I can't use that as my animal lest everyone think I stole it from you. Are foxes dogs? They seem more like cats. Which is probably why I like them. They are closer to cats than dogs. Cats fascinate. They are rude, sleep all day, and slink about- everything I want to be in life. 

My cat looks something like this. He has the startling ability to go from looking like the spawn of satan to the cutest thing every in the blink of an eye. He's helping me plan a global takeover. But he sheds sooooooo much. Dont look at him too long or you will covered in hair. I need to go to bed. I'm sorry if you read the whole thing. Now that I've typed this really trippy post I'll probably have to present tomorrow. Oh well.