Don't stab me, Dad!

If I recall correctly, we've run into this Abraham guy before in previous Bible stories. Apparently he's a pretty devout guy, always doing what God says and stuff. Which is why God granted him one son, Isaac, when Abraham was really old. Abraham really really loved his son, and God noticed this and decided to test JUST how faithful Abraham could get. So he ordered Abraham to go to a mountain in Moriah and friggin sacrifice Isaac for Him. So Abraham, devout man as he was, took his son on a three-day journey to Moriah, not telling Isaac what was up. When they were climbing the mountain, Isaac (presumably with an adorable, heartbreaking look of innocence) is all like, "hey dad, I see we're carrying some stuff to do a sacrifice, but... where's the lamb?" *innocent blink*. And Abraham is like "UH... God will provide the lamb... haha yeah...". Then the get to the top of the mountain and build an altar, and suddenly tied up Isaac and stuck him on the altar. He then pulled out the knife and stuff, while Isaac probably laid there FREAKING OUT. Then at the last second, as Abraham raises the knife with a reflected glitter and a dramatic lens flare, God's like "WAIT, don't kill him! Haha it was just a test, you passed." Abraham turned around, and found a ram stuck in a bush behind him. So he untied Isaac, and they sacrificed the ram instead. Isaac just glowered in betrayal. Most likely.

True sacrifice is... ugh. When I have to give up my internet. It is literally the hardest thing for me in all of ever. I'm thinking about it cuz I'll have to do it tomorrow. It's okay when it's just a few hours, but sometimes I have to go a whole week without internet, like when I'm in the wilderness. Not only do I use it as my only form of at-home entertainment, it's also the only way I can talk to... certain people. Since I don't have a smartphone, and I can't text internationally. And there are... certain people that I talk to a lot who do not live in this country. So yeah, the internet is my LIFE. If there's no internet in the zombie apocalypse, I'll just shoot myself BEFORE I get bitten.